It took a few days (a week to be exact) but I finally feel like I have my groove back. I am back to hectic days and sleepless night; which actually feels familiar. Following the pictures of Cape Town I started to develop a slide presentation for Bangkok and realized it wasn't worth it. I can sum it up for anyone that is interested: Filthy. however, for my own entertainment and hopefully your enjoyment, I had the following pictures taken of me.
Well, I am on my way back to Iraq for another six weeks and as crazy as it might sound, I'm actually missing the place a little bit. What I miss are the people, the work, and the ability to plunge my head in the sand and forget the world around me. That said, this has been an amazing trip. The short story is that I went to Cape Town South Africa for a week and then onto Bangkok Thailand for another week. Well, the long story is that I decided early on to make an adventure out of it. Being that I have never traveled alone before I was nervous and then add to that the fact that I was going without Michael which was very sad at times. Knowing these two factors could doom my trip, I decided to jam in absolutly anything and everything that I possibly could; within my budget of course. I also made a lot of friends, which I'll highlight later, that gave me great advice on what to do and what to avoid. For now I am going to start with pictures of South Africa. These are not just of Cape Town but also Franshhoek and Stellenbosch, both in the winelands. Because I did so much I will have to put this up in phases. The pictures below were tken in South Africa.
Just wrapping up the first leg of my vacation and hard as I try, I can't stop thinking how much Michael would have enjoyed this trip.
I have not updated in nearly a month - wow. I know that it is not a really good excuse, but honestly I just wanted to be left alone. Getting past the idea of being without Michael has been very difficult. Even after a pretty honest and emotional visit to DC last week I am still gripping on to any and every shred of hope. I know, I can own it - I'm pathetic!
I was a little apprehensive, but today has turned out to be a pretty good day. The measures that the military had taken in the two previous days made a huge impact and as a result there were no significant attacks on the green zone. I resisted the temptation of laying in bed all day and went into the office around noon. I am glad I did because when I got there I realized that the Iraqi restaurants were not open (there are very few places in the IZ where Iraqi's can eat) so I quickly went to my dining facility to pick up box lunches. It was kinda neat because I took back a traditional Christmas dinner which included turkey, stuffing, green beans, corn, green beans, and of course pumpkin pie. We all sat around and ate our lunches out of white styrofoam, but it was pretty cool.
This evening we went to the main dining facility at the Presidential Palace. I don't go here too often because I honestly want to keep it as a bit of a special treat, but this places does holidays very well - as you can see from the picture above. Tonight I passed on the traditional dinner and went for the lobster, prime rib, shrimp and sweet potatoes. I twas nice to sit with friends and enjoy the holiday music and sip on non-alcoholic champagne.
This was not the best Christmas that I have ever had, but it did have the potential to be the worst; but I wouldn't let it - I just keep looking forward. Tomorrow I will go out into the red zone again. I enjoy these trips, not because of the danger, but because they are an opportunity to get more involved; to become part of a bigger solution.
Well, its getting late here and so I'll wind down.
One of the reasons that I don't blog more often is that I don't see my entries as diary, instead I see them as story driven. The problem is that by time I write the entry, something else has happened or I have lost interest. Well, I'm going to try one tonight that is a bit more brief, but covers a few topics...we'll see how it goes.
Well, that's it for now. I apologize for being so melancholy, but I guess its best to get it out. I hope that everyone back in the states has a great holiday season and to those in Poland, Switzerland, N. Korea, Thailand, Australia, Canada, Brazil, Germany, Italy, Israel, Moskow...ect...enjoy December???
After a grueling two weeks, and yes they were intense, Stephanie is making her way to South Dakota to spend the holidays with her family. Having her these past two weeks has made this little spot in the desert very tolerable.
We had a great conversation last night about our lives where we are and how both of our worlds have been turned upside down over the past year and how despite it all, we continue to trek through the storm.
We have all heard the saying that"if life gives you lemons, then make lemonade". Well, it is kinda true. When Steph got here earlier this month I was forced to deal with some pretty intense personal issues. Adding to that, my job freakin insane; its truly a love-hate relationship. She wasn't on the ground 30 minutes and there we were, making lemonade.
2008 is going to be amazing, I can feel it. I am still reluctant to let go of things from the past, but as each day passes, I'm becomming more excitied about grabbing onto what is next...inevitabley one arm will be stronger than the other.
Running across your ex's new online profile and finding out that you weren't even their type!
Its 5:14 am and I can't sleep. The work here is not getting any more intense, rather more complicated. Its going on 8 weeks now and sometimes I am really not sure what I am doing here.
Fanny got in late Wednesday. Its kind of funny how it was the high point of my time here as well as the low. The high for obvious reasons; she is a fantastic friend and an all out cool chick to roll with. The low has nothing to do with her, rather she reminds me of the life I left back in DC. I don't regret my decision to come here and giving the chance, I would not reverse my decision, but in spending time with her over the past few days I am taken back to the nights we would walk from the apt on the Hill to Hawk & Dove to watch dancing boy, or those 3:30 am amazing dinners she would cook because Pizza-by-the-Slice wasn't gonna cut it, or the Baltimore water taxi ride that really cemented us as friends.
Over the past few weeks my life has changed in a way that I could have never imagined. I am in one of the most fascinating places in one of the most important times in history and I am still stunned by the break-up. Having Fanny here has made the situation real. I am beginning to think that breaking-up is like quitting smoking, you never want to tell anyone or talk about it in the beginning.
Well, morning prayers have started, so I guess thats my sign. For my five readers, good night.
I have spent the past couple of weeks holding out hope that things would work out at home, but tonight I got handed a heavy dose of reality. So I got to spend the past two hours on the phone itemizing the past seven years of my life then negotiating financial terms and the distribution personal items - typical Saturday night, right? Its all right. This is not what I wanted, but I am going to take it in stride. I love my job and have never been more excited about what I am doing. I will spend the next two years traveling the world and finding some sort of peace in who I am - I know, sounds corny!!!
On a positive note, today was a beautiful day here in Iraq. The temperature was mild and the winds were low. There were a few car bombs, but they were a bit distant. I am surprised however about how cold it gets here at night. They warn me that it gets worse, but coming from N. Indiana, I think I can manager a winder in Iraq. In other exciting news, Stephanie is heading out next week, which I am looking too. Everyone needs a Steph in their life. In early December I am heading to Amman, Jordan for a conference. That will cut my time short with Steph, but it is an amazing opportunity.
Now, what your all waiting for...the vacation decision. Though I have not decided, I am leaning toward Greece or Italy. My goal is travel over my birthday (Feb. 19) but that's a long time in Iraq.
I'm heading out on another "mission" this morning and for the first time I am feeling anxious. Perhaps because this is my first journey alone or because the expectations on me are higher...not sure.
At any rate, wish me luck.
Its 11:45 pm and I am just getting back to my "hooch". I can't tell you how much I hate that term. I haven't had a lot of time of update, but I am constantly "planning on doing it tonight". Well, its finally tonight and I am a bit tired. But, since I cannot call each of you individually, I just wanted to drop a quick not to say hi.
Things are going very well here and even though I work a lot, I wouldn't trade this for anything in the world. I am taking more and more trips out to the red zone, which kinda worries me a bit. Not because of anything specific, its just the statistics; the more often you go out the higher your odds of an incident.
On a more positive note, I want everybodies help. I have been in Iraq since October 21. The funny thing is, I was supposed to return the following week. Well, fortunately for me, that never happened. I had another trip scheduled for home in early December, but because of a conference in Amman, Jordan, that is not going to take place either. What I have decided is that God does not want me to go back to DC and frankly, I'm cool with that. Here's where you come in. I need a vacation destination.
I am taking a vacation in late January or early February. I want to go some place that is reasonable, but fantastic. The only condition I have is that it is warm. I have had a lot of suggestions from my colleagues, but I would like to hear from you. Use the e-mail address below to tell me where I should go and why.
IUMPA2005@gmail.com
I'm headed out into the "red zone" again this morning. For those that don't know, the red zone is the opposite of the green zone. It is not secured and frankly it is not safe for anyone, including Iraqi's. I will go in with an amazing amount of protection, but of course there is risk regardless. It is pretty hard to sleep the night before a trip.
Everything else is running smooth. We launched our website and application this weekend, so I am pretty excited about that. We did suffer a pretty heavy mortar attack, which I can say because it was covered by the media. And as far as whats next, I didn't forget about my list, so I will start putting my thoughts down this evening.
The Thanksgiving weekend is nearly over and I think I have survived yet another. This was a little more different than those past, but not completely different. Isn't it funny how a mother to one is mother to all. As I was feeling a bit sad for myself because I was not among my family I thought about all the mothers over here and how much they miss their children. But we know we are all in this together so there is a family-like quality as well.
One other tradition that I missed, but don't miss....the weekend after shopping trip. I have been following it on the news here and realized, "dam, we American's have strange habits!".
Thanks for your e-mail comments. I will hopefully have up the functionality that allows readers to click a button to submit an e-mail.
I woke up this morning knowing that I was going to completely dread this day. This is the first holiday since the split and I had no idea how I was going to deal with it. Up until today I didn't have to thinking about it. The one good thing about being is Baghdad is that it is very easy to forget about your problems. First off, is is easy to look around and see that your problems are minor compared to others and second, when your working 14 hour days you don't have a lot of free time to think about those sorts of things. You march on an dhope like hell there are no significant breaks in the day. However, on days such as this, you can't escape your own memories.
My day start off slow. The alarm went off only to be complete ignored. I simply laid there staring at the ceiling thinking to myself, "why am I here?" "Is there a purpose?" When I left DC five weeks ago I was in absolute bliss. My personal life was in order, I had been selected for a coveted project, I even felt that I was evoloving as a person; I was finally growing up and I had a plan for the future. I was focused on our future. However, as I lay there this morning I realized that its just me now, it is my future and I have to decide what I want to do with it. Most can relate to this, but when your a couple nearly everything you do or every decision you make is a joint effort. When to go on vacation, what car to buy, where to move, should you take this job, etc. Personally, even with myself, I always saw it as a crutch; an excuse in the event you make the wrong decision. However, you grow to rely on this counsel.
An hour and a half later I roll out of bed. Considering I have not taken a day off since arriving here, I did not rush out the door. After an hour or so of prep work, I head into work. Usually I am one of the first into the office, so rolling in two hours late was a bit intimidating. I was anticipating a certain degree of razzing, but I got now. Instead as I turned into the office all of my Iraqi team members approached me one by one to shake my hand and wish me a Happy Thanksgiving (of course there variations in pronunciations). This folks made my day! I really like these guys! After an hour or so of work we all convened downstairs for a catered lunch and a disucssion on what Thanksgiving means to us Americans.
So, my day is getting better. It is about 5:00 and I am meeting with the Office Manager to go over our web application and all hell breaks loose. I have heard car bombs go off several times, but this was no car bomb. Because we are in an environment where gun fire and blasts in the distance are common, there is little conversation. But as we sat there and heard the first explosion - we paused - then the second - we paused again - the third....the look in one anothers eyes indicated that the meeting was over. As we ran out to join the others huddled in a stairway I wasn't afraid, rather curious. It wasn't until the lock down was lifted 3 1/2 hours later that I realized how terrified I should have been. (if your interested in hearing the specifics then e-mail me)
I find the day has come in full circle. I am sitting here now thinking about my life hoping like hell that tomorrow will be another 14 hour day.
It may sound hard to believe, but one the thing that is not talked about here in Iraq is U.S. politics. Don’t get me wrong, you will hear an occasional light-hearted jab directed toward the President and of course Hillary is fair game, but for the most part there is no serious conversation about the Presidential race, the senate and Lord knows congress doesn't make the list. So, for a guy who loves politics and has spent the last two years in DC, this is pleasant 
surprise. Though I haven’t spend a lot of time thinking about it, it wasn't until today that it occurred to me why we are not more interested in the race here: because there is no media here telling us we have to be.
This afternoon I was showing my pictures from the trip to Karbala. Being a native Iraqi he was able to teach me about the Prophet Muhammad and the holy site the Shrine of Husayn ibn Ali. The pictures depict us at different stages of the day such as traveling in the Blackhawk, being received the Chief of Police and then by the Governor of Karbala, the town and its people, and three farms. In addition to these planned visits two press conferences were held. It was when I was thumbing (clicking to be exact) through the pictures that I had an “ah ha” moment; a revelation about the media.
There are some important things to note about this meeting in Karbala. First of all Karbala is the only province that has been completely handed over to the Iraqi Military. The handover happened took place on October 29. The purpose of our trip was to demonstrate to the Governor, the people of Iraq, and the rest of the world that the U.S. Government is the first in line to establish business relationships. As mentioned in my previous entry we were accompanied by representative from the Prime Minister’s office, the Department of Defense, the State Department and members of the U.S. business community. To capture this historic event many – the rise of a province heavily affected by the way – two press conferences were held. Please see the picture below and tell me what is missing.
It is a bit small, but what you don't see is CNN, MSNBC, BBC, ABC, NBC, CBS, AP, Washington Post, LA Times, Fox News....but wait...this is a signficant event. The United States Government is doing what it has been slammed for not doing; rebuilding Iraq.
