The Indiana Trip...

As wrote last week, I am back in Bloomington this week to relax and spend some time with family and friends. The drive was smooth and went by quickly; which I attribute to anticipation. My time here has been great. It is certainly the break I need from work and DC in general.

One of the great things about Bloomington is that it changes very little. Within the parameters of the University (five blocks each way), IU is truly a campus in a college town. Whether you are jogging down 3rd street past the fraternities and sororities after class or stumbling up Kirkwood toward the Sample Gates on your way home from Nicks after few failed rounds of Sink the Biz, the campus has that special vibe. In visiting Blooming this week, I had two goals. The first was to spend time with friends and second, was to spend some time on campus.

This first night in town I stayed on campus in the Memorial Union (hotel). Since graduation took place earlier this month, securing a room was not difficult at all. Becoming accustomed to nicer hotels lately, I wasn't expecting much from the union so the surprise when I walked into the room was even more rewarding. Not only was the room amazing, but the windows looked out across the campus, particularly over the Beck Chapel and the main creek that runs through campus. The first few hours I laid in the bed with reading a book with the windows open listening to the sound of the water running over the rocks below. That bliss was briefly disturbed by one of Indiana's other great attributes, the beetle. This damn bug flew into the room and like all idiot beetles, started running into things. For the most part, I have no problem with insects. I do draw the line with landing on me, but other than that, "mi casa, su casa". So I lay and read and this god damn thing keeps hitting the wall, TV, lamp, door...everything. Being the passive nature lover I am, I moved toward the insect to escort the little fella out the window, then quickly realized that I'm a DC'ite now, so I whacked it....done, back to reading.

Monday I woke up at 6:30 and started my own personal tour of campus. I was going to do a quick jog for old times sake, but I'm on vacation, so I walked and walked then walked more. After hitting the highlights, the Kelley School of Business, SPEA, HPER, and the fountain, I made my way down to Starbucks for morning coffee. Kirkwood was exactly as I left it two years ago and I couldn't help just walking down the street. The only thing that was missing from my adventure; friends. Rarely did I ever do anything in Bloomington without friends. I couldn't help thinking about Steph, Elena, Jessica, Josh, Chester....

After my trip down memory lane I fed my affinity for IU by stopping by every campus bookstore, the TIS bookstore, and anyone that sold anything with IU on it. I will come back to DC truly "representin" the IU.

Well, theres been a lot more, but I will share that later.

Caution...too much clicking on myspace leads to this...

Your Heart Is Purple

For you, love is about establishing and developing a deep connection. If it's true love, it brings you more wisdom and inner strength. Your flirting style: Sincere Your lucky first date: An afternoon at a tea house Your dream lover: Is both thoughtful and expressive What you bring to relationships: Understanding

What Color Heart Do You Have?

I have been living in Washington DC for nearly two years now and it never really occurred to me that I have not been back to Indiana since moving out here. I have made one day trips for Christmas or other special occasions, but never because I wanted too. Well, I want too.

I've thought some about it and I realized that I really miss the Hoosier State. At first I thought that I just missed the people like my cool as hell former boss Judith, my ex-best friend Andrea(we're friends now), and even an ex David, who despite a ridiculous relationship and the passing "X" number of years has turned out to be a bizarre life coach to me in recent years. What I miss is my former life, I miss the simplicity of making a quick dash to the grocery store or the ability to drive through the streets without having dodge taxicabs. I miss people like Chester and Jeremy who are the kind of friends that just want to sit, have a beer and chat about how fun this or that was. I feel like I'm a character in a Lifetime Movie and have to go home to get in touch with who I am.

Now I feel like I need to give DC a "shout-out". I do love DC and even as I eagerly await my journey this week, I know that the likely hood of me ever living in Indiana again is pretty slim...but I can sure sit at Yogi's and have a $2.00 beer

I'll take pics for all you IU Fans.

One Fun Sunday...

I am not a big fan of crowds at all and for the most part have successfully avoided events like Taste of Arlington in the past. However, since Alberto was leaving for two weeks (PA then South Africa), we said hell with it, and headed toward the metro.

It was a blast. Perhaps its because the girl at the beer truck screwed up and didn't check off our first two drinks or maybe because P.F. Changs had a stand, either way we had a great time. So, to Alberto, Michael, Andrew, Charlie, and Rudi...holla!

Below are some pictures from the event. Enjoy.

The hardest thing I've ever done...

There's a Hole in My Sidewalk
by Potia Nelson

Chapter One
I walk down a street and there's a big hole. I don't see it and fall into it. It's dark and hopeless and it takes me a long time to find my way out. It's not my fault !

Chapter Two
I walk down the same street. There's a big hole and I can see it, but I still fall in. It's dark and hopeless and it takes me a long time to get out. It's still not my fault.

Chapter Three
I walk down a street. There's a big hole. I can see it, but I still fall in. It's become a habit. But I keep my eyes open and get out immediately. It is my fault.

Chapter Four
I walk down a street. There's a big hole. And I walk around it.

Chapter Five
I walk down a different street.

A friend sent me this poem earlier today. At first I thought of it like every other"pep-talk" e-mail that is circulated, but then I read it. It's pretty amazing in that it illustrates that as complicated as we make life out to be, in the end it is amazing how simple it is.

I said good-bye to Stephen today, one of the hardest things I have ever done. Stephen is a great guy that I got to know over the past six months. During that period I learned a great deal about myself and the world around me and for that I cannot be more grateful. I wish him the best in his life, love, and career.

So the hard part, Chapter 5, walking down a different street....

Hmmmm...

There is not really much that I can add here except that I thought that V.P. Cheney had straighted out the Iraqi Parliament a week or so ago. I mean, hell, he scared the shit out of me, and he was thousands of miles a way. Perhaps he should take a couple of these boys out on a "Texas Style" hunting trip...that should do the trick.

For Stephanie...

Ok, I couldn't resist seeking this video out and posting it for you. Our mutual love for this song only demonstrates how strange we really are...



Also, we had a great time last night with Nicki. Ryan was very successful in keeping it a surprise. Of course our group gave her liquor. It was also interesting sitting with a group of Hill Rats that work for Hil. Even our usually composed KT fell into the trap "OMG, you work down the hall in blah blah dumb asses office"....OMG, do you know who I rode in the elevator with??? Oh and finally, the Cuban gets big props. Not once did he point at something and fart and he gave everyone a ride home. You would have been proud!!

Anyway, love ya...come home soon.

Crazy Crap...

I've got this song in my head today:



I know, I know...I have not been good lately at updating my loyal legions on the arbitrary occurances of my life. I don't have the time or energy to really dedicate this week, but since I know Steph is watching from a distance, I thought I should leave something here for her to look at.

First of all, I'm a freaking moron. Last night I took a break from the insanity of life / work to enjoy a baseball game. Rob and I headed to the stadium, stopped and enjoyed a few on the way of course, to watch the Nats play the Braves. Now, I'm not sure if I was excited about the Nats winning, the beautiful evening, or the stop along the way, but I was having a great time. So, after the game, Rob and the wife wanted to have a drink....a drink you say...OK. So, we head up to Capitol Hill for a little drinky drinky. After a few pictures we make our way home, them to their car me to the metro. Now, considering the time, I had to bust ass, but when I got there I had plenty of time (8 minutes). So, I sat down, flipped out my phone and started reading the news. Now, heres where I am an idiot. I actually heard over the loud speaker that the approaching train was the last train for the evening...so I sat. It wasn't until I saw the red lights leaving me behind that the message sank in...I was stuck. So, no big deal, hail a cab. I walk outside laughing at how stupid I am... I heard then say "last train, but I sat". At any rate, I hail a cab and give my directions (twice). I'm in a shirt and tie looking professional you know. We get about ten blocks away and he says, "you know I am only taking cash" Hmm, I don't know why I felt this the time to listen. I said, I don't have cash...and just like the movies, you heard the tires squeal as the brakes were swiftly applied. If you know anything about DC then you know that H Street is the new "up and coming" neighborhood. Well, that might be true near Capitol Hill, but at H and Maryland Street, its another story. This damn driver put me out right there. No ATM, no I'll pay you with the cash when I get there...get out. So, I walked and walked and walked. Morale of the story, I'm drinking and driving next time!

Second, the Y-Me walk was this past Sunday. In case you don't know what it is, the Y-me is a annual 3-mile walk to raise money for breast cancer patients and surviors. On a personal level, it was an amazing experience. To walk next to those who have fought through the disease, to walk next to those still fighting the disease, and to walk next to those who are walking as a show of love for those that did not survive, was a complete humbling experience. For those who don't know, and I'd say thats most of you, things have been a bit rough for me lately. I am struggling with a lot of personal issues. I could go on, but the point is that my issues are so little compared to the people that I surrounded myself with Sunday. I am truly lucky. And on one final Y-Me note, through the kindness of family and friends, I was able to raise $1165. So, to those that contributed, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

Work Sucks!
I am really struggling with my job lately. I thought after we lost the one trouble maker that things would be fine. Funny thing about someone that causes you grief, you know the beast you fight. I am finding out that I'd rather fight her than to have to learn the punching strategy of another. I'm not sure if its the personal life impacting the work life, but I feel constantly defeated at work. I go in with a positive perspective, only to be sucker punched in the first 15 minutes. I'm really not sure how much longer I can take it. I'm not talking anything severe mind you, perhaps a shift to another project or even another firm. I really like the nature of my work, just the constant struggle sux.

Other Random Thoughts:
The weather is amazing!

The Men Date...

Since Fanny jumped ship and headed out of the country last month, MKO and I have taken advantage of the opportunity to get to know the Cuban a bit better. While he can't sling back a Yuengling as good as our Fanny, he has surprised me lately by keeping up and being a hell of a lot of fun. The three of us have taken to "man dates".

Our last man date was last night. Being that maven that he is, MKO and I were invited, along with three other guys to join the Cuban at a reception to celebrate public servants - I am not a public servant. Anyway, we meet up and this reception wasn't half bad. It was held at the Old Postal Museum near Union Station. To our surprise the food was good and the beer and wine was free. The six of us closed that mother down! This new character that joined our group was hysterical....made me laugh, and that takes some effort. Hes a little older than me and single, so hes talking up a group of 40-something women. The only funny thing about this story was as me and the other four guys are standing in a circle talking (while hes trying to score come granny-stuff) we hear him say "anal probe". Well, goes without saying that it went downhill from there. As the ladies were getting up to leave however they made one final gesture; one offered him the rest of her beer...really! She actually handed him a half-empty bottle of beer - who does that?. This dude looked normal to me, not like he was having the DTs from lack of alcohol.

After the reception we trekked over to the Irish Times to chase our beer down with more beer. it all, it was fun. MKO and I departed for home and as we were getting on the train I realized that we were all on a man date. No one was "looking" for anything, rather just a group of guys hanging out. We're totally getting our nails done tomorrow...LOL

Random stuff

I'm trying the facial scruff. Not really sure if I like it or not, opinions welcome...

One for Steph...

Whoever said it wouldn't work....was correct...lol

A Great Weekend...

As indicated in previous posts, I traveled back to Cincinnati this past weekend for the Flying Pig Half Marathon. It is not my intent to hop all over the country running in random races, but I did this one for two reasons. First, to support my niece in her first real run and second, to return to the city that symbolized my first real step into adulthood.

The Race: This is Ash and I the day before the race. Look at that smile, the poor child is so unaware of what awaits her the next morning. Being a good uncle however, at her insistence, went a nice pub just east of Downtown for a few drinks...you know, to prepare. Still trusting that she knew what she was doing as far as training for the race, I heeded her advice and enjoyed a icy cold beer. It was a great afternoon. We ate, drank, and I doled out advice on race "preparations". Saturday evening my family started to roll into town. It was pretty low key, mostly chilled, had some dinner, then watched some TV. I'm not sure what I was nervous about, but I didn't sleep at all that night, maybe 2.5 hours. Up at 4 am, Ash and I headed downtown for a 6:30 am gun. It was a bit brisk, but we were "in it to finish".

The race was a bit more intense than I had imagined. I have been training since Chicago last year, so my race pace is just under a 9 minute mile. Ash's was a bit slower, but pretty good for her first race. The hills were much more intense than I had imagined they would be. We literally ran up hill from mile 3 to mile 10. It was at mile 5 that she confessed that she really hadn't been training as she had previously stated. Determined, we kept our mantra that we were going to finish either way.

Once we hit mile 10 and realized that it was "downhill from here" we were relieved. Here is us between 10 and 11 (don't we look remarkably fresh?). In the end we did very well. We finished the race in 2 hours 44 minutes.

I am so proud of her. For someone that had never run more than 4 miles in her life but ran 13.1 non-stop up hills out of sheer determination and ambition, I am in awe.

Here's to Ash!!!

Coming home...sorta

For those that don't know, I lived in Cincinnati from late 1989 to early 1993 ish... I was the first of my large family to move more than an hour from my mother, so it was a big step. I moved to Cincinnati in 1989 in pursuit of a girl (looking back, I really dodged a bullet...a BIG one). At any rate, it was during my stay in the Queen City (I know, irony right??) that I met Colleen. I have two very distinct recollections of that meeting. The first was her insatiable curiosity about dead animals (she had skeletons everywhere) and the second was that she borrowed my car and didn't come back for four hours...when your 20, that's a long time. Well, needless to say, the first meeting was not so wonderful. Fortunately for me, all that changed.

Fast forward 17 years now and I can honestly say that she is the best friend that I have ever had. She has seen me through serious relationships and not so serious relationships, a long drive cross country towing her car with two kittens on the dashboard, I watched her fight with the waiter in Little Italy NY over an egg plant parmesan lunch (remarkably our lunches came out an hour later,in an empty restaurant!), and become so pissed at me in Boston that she would not eat the freshly caught lobster. But through it all, she has been there. When I was sad, she'd drive through the night to sit with me, only to turn around 2 hours later and make the same 4 hour trek back home. Time was never an issue if you I needed a friend.

It is seeing her and spending time with her this weekend that re centers me on what friendship and happiness means. Colleen was there when I literally had nothing (I was fired from a Dunken Donuts) and now that we've both established our lives and we're moving toward old age together, she still looks, talks, and acts the same way as ever...a best friend. I do not get to see her as often as either of us would like, but when we do its so familiar, non-judgemental, unprotected, and unreserved. She is one of these rare people that is sincere in what she says and I know shes my friend...

Finally, I want to say how much I really hate the term "best friend" because it is so singular, it implies that only one can be the best. So, to all of my other "best friends" get your ass home!

Headed to the Flying Pig

Wish me luck...13.1 miles. Actually, it won't be too bad. I'm doing it more to support my niece who is running her first big race. I'll post some pics when its complete, providing that they are not horrible....trust me, after 10 miles, we all look like hell!

Have a great weekend!

Friendster Update...

I didn't realize how much a social tool the Internet was until I hit grad school. It was early on in the first semester and every time I turned around someone was asking what my screen name for this site or that site was. So, like most everyone else in the modern world, I signed up for them....The Facebook, MySpace, Friendster, Classmates...and probably others I've forgotten about. As grad school became and smaller image in the rear view mirror of life, I stopped checking or updating the sites...nearly forgot about them until today.

While doing my favorite past-time today, cyber-stalking, I googled a name from my past. I'm not sure why I did it, but curiosity got the best of me. At any rate, I put the name in, clicked "Google Search" and just like that, it was there in front of me. The friendster profile. I clicked and read (its always interesting to read how people view themselves in the world) looked at pictures, clicked at some friends. It was nice, cathartic (emotionally purging, not strongly laxative). Anyway, it was fun. So, I'm moving on, getting ready to close then I see a little image that says you are linked to blah through blah and the second blah is NS (five links).

I just laughed....

...and then she marched right up to the hopper.

With all the excitement in my life lately (or lack of), I totally forgot to give a virtual high-five to our own real-life Elle Wood. See, my good friend KT is doing a brief stint in Senator blah-blib'd-blah's office. This is supposed to be a 3-month excursion from her permanent position, a vacation if you will. KT could have easily sat around for those three months, enjoying lattes with Hillary, Nancy, and maybe even Dick (probably not Dick), but she didn't.

See that sat KT in a corner and gave her a random assignment having to do with economic development of the ______ (my listening faded here). That ho took the assignment and ran. So, to make a long story short, in the two months that she has been in the Senate a bill that she initiated was sent to the floor (I hope I'm using the right terminology). Unfortunately, the bill is currently dead, though they may introduce it with other legislation later.

KT, I speak for all of your IU friends and I say great job!!

Snaps for KT....*SNAP* *SNAP* *SNAP* *SNAP* *SNAP*

Tuesday Entry...

I realized earlier this morning that I have not provided an update in a few days. I am beginning to realize how much time and effort it takes to do daily entries. Actually, I have started a few, but have yet to finish them for one reason or another. One is really funny, another is a folksy friendship entry, and yet another I realized is a bit too personal...however, I do want to provide some updates for those of you at home still watching.

DC is absolutely beautiful right now. Its warm, but not oppressive. A cool breeze sweeps through the house. The evenings are even better, bedroom windows wide open. I've been spending as much time outside in the yard as I can. I don't think I am accomplishing much, but I'm getting a hell of a tan, among other things...

Yes, that's right. I managed to get poison ivy. I do wish there was a seedy story, you know, a romp in the woods, but unfortunately, there is not. I was helping the neighbors cut down their rain forest and got into the nasty plant. I don't realize for several days. As you might imagine, I'm not looking too hot. I haven't had the rash since Camp Pottawatomie in the 3rd grade. I had a girlfriend at the time, here name was Tina (random memory). At any rate, I have kept myself busy around the house for a couple days. I finally broke down and went to the urgent care clinic today to get a medical opinion and some meds. Of course I was right and I got my meds. The lotion works well, but I'm honestly concerned about the Prednisone; one of the side effects is depression. I'll just think happy thoughts.

Planning a vacation soon. This year has been my roughest year ever. It has not been one thing, but a culmunation of many things. Dealing with difficult personalities at work, worrying about promotions, selling new business, the incredible amount of work the house needs, the exercise, and even some relationship issues. I spend a lot of time overwhelmed. I know a vacation won't fix anything, but it will sure make the anxiety tolerable.

The Flying Pig Half Marathon. Despite my aches and pains, I am still running a half marathon this Sunday. Trust me, if it weren't for my niece, I would have bagged this sucker long ago. But I'm a good uncle. Leaving early Friday and coming back late Sunday. It a bizarre way, I don't want to leave DC. I have the sensation that I am leaving something behind...hmmm.

Ok, that's all I got for now. Hopefully I will be more responsible and update more often.

You lead, I'll follow...

Taking my Luzernian friends lead, I give you the Wikipedia birthday game. Ok, its really not a game, and you don't get prize, but its interesting and educational. Best yet, I don't have to be creative...this blogging shit is hard. But to my loyal subjects, I am compelled..

Ok, here is the jist....

1. Go to Wikipedia and enter your birthday without the year: February 19

2. List three events that occurred that day:
1847 - The Donner Party is rescued. It is noted that some of the survivors seem to be remarkably well-fed considering their ordeal. (Top that one!!)
1964 - Paul Simon writes "The Sounds of Silence," the song which, in a year and a half, will catapult him and Art Garfunkel to stardom as Simon & Garfunkel. (Irony?)
1968 - National Educational Television (the predecessor to the Public Broadcasting Service in the United States) debuts the children's television program Mister Rogers' Neighborhood (I have nothing here....just astonishment)

3. List two important birthdays:

1946 - Karen Silkwood, American activist (d. 1974) (interesting...)
1960 - Andrew, Duke of York (Not a Prince, but I'll settle)

4. List one death:
2003 - Johnny PayCheck, American singer (b. 1938) (still can't resist this little do wop - "Take this job and shove it..."

5. List one holiday or observance:
Astrology: First day of sun sign Pisces
Astrology: Can also be last day of sun sign Aquarius depending on the time of birth and the astrologer's viewpoint. (I'm a cusp baby...if that explains anything)

Ok, so that was a little fun. Now, you try it. I guarantee you will tell your grandchildren about tit..or not.

Mood: Pretty good, however if one more tall blonde catches me off guard by innocently standing next to me at another cross walk, hes getting a punch in the neck!!

Not your average Thursday...

When I moved to DC in July of 2005 it purely out of my love for politics. Mind you, I do not now nor have I had an interest in running for office or working in a congressional / executive office. I am not even crazy for that "sense of power" thta one gues once they get tothe hill. With few exceptions, I avoid hill staffers like the plaque. Rather, I like the sense of rightness and fairness that can be the byproduct of these amazing bodies. Hand to God, every time I walk by the Capitol I break out in song (if you know me, you know the Capitol has nothing to do with it) and...you know where I'm going here...



...come on, you know damn well you'll be singing that damn song the rest of the day. At any rate, something changed a few years back. At some point rightness and fairness slipped out of the city under the darkness of night to an undisclosed location where until recently it has been hiding.

So, as I move into my third year of existence in this crazy city, I am encouraged by the changes that are occurring around us. Not in who is winning the most recent debate between Republicans and Democrats on Hardball or the latest alleged ruffle between Hillary and Obama, but in the renewed debate on what is good for country. On that note, I leave you with the following video. If you haven't seen it yet, please take the eight minutes. It is Rep Jack Murtha's closing comments last night. They are heartfelt, honest, and unafraid.



Mood: My mood is very good today. Maybe its because I worked from home most of the day or because I'm feeling the effects of all that running, but its very cool!

Two Crazy Bitches....

Arent' these two a lovely lot?

I don't even know how to start this entry. I just keep staring at these two pictures and thinking about how much I really do not like Rosie and Condi....but why?

I really can't think of anything profound to say except I'm glad Rosie is out of another job and I cannot want for the photo-op of Condi with her hand in the air being sworn in before the House Oversight Committee. I really do not think much is going to come out of it, but it will be good TV.

Other notable happenings in my life:

• I've taken to reading again. I resisted it for a while, but now I'm back. Currently I am reading Harry Potter #6 and Kite Runner. We'll see which has a better ending.
• I am completely frustrated with my job. The new manager has not helped and the old bitch is still driving me nuts - no the bitch is not gone! I am really not sure what I am going to do. The program I am supporting wants to hire me, but I have only been with my current firm just over a year. Of course, as attractive as the program job is, working with some of these people for the rest of my career could cause some real damage.
• In one week I pulled two muscles which has put a stop to my gym visits. I still intend on running the Cincinnati Flying Pig Half Marathon next month. I am sure that I will not top my Cherry Blossom time, but running with my niece, I knew that would be the case. Seeking healing hands for my ribs and my neck --anyone???
• From a personal perspective, I am working hard to fit in around the house. Over the past few months I have spent too much time at work and doing other things and spent less time with MKO and the home place. It feels really good, we dug a tree up yesterday. To be honest, I think MKO would like it if there was a balance if you know what I mean...LOL In addition, I have really cut back on the number of hours I am working lately.
• As of yesterday, Steph has been in S. Africa for one week. With only five more to go until she gets home...I am excited. I do hope she is having a blast.
• Thinking Vacation....where? Any ideas?

Ok, well, that's it for now. But before I go, I want to give some shout outs. It seems that folks in Auckland New Zealand, Bonner Springs Kansas, Beijing China, and Luzern Switzerland have become fans...or stalkers??? Thanks for dropping in, leave a note.

I

Category: Holy Shit!!!

I ran across this commercial a week or so ago when I was looking for the "Gay Kiss". I had read the summary, so I knew what to expect, but in the end I still found myself staring at the screen in disbelief. This was obviously not produced for American TV, but in my humble opinion, it is very effective in getting the point across.

Robot Chicken - Giraffe

Happy Monday Morning Everyone!!

I love this cartoon. I mean really, how often do you really get to hear a giraffe curse.

I'm getting ready to schlep to the shower in an attempt to start my week. Hitting trivia tonight at the Wonderland in Col. Heights. This should be a lot of fun sober. The last two times I went I hurt the game organizer's feelings....oops. (in my defense, this guy was wearing skin-tight capri pants)

Weekend recap

Happy 30th Birthday Tracy

Let me start by saying right off that this has been the best weekend I have had in several months! Don't bet me wrong, its not that all the other weekends were bad, but somehow all the stars lined up for a great time.

Friday - Ok, to be honest, this day did not start out well for me. Early on I had an emotional flashback or two that put me on an anxious path (not ambiguous at all..right?). After a roller-coaster of a day I suddenly realized that it didn't have to be that way. I'm not sure what happened, but at some point my whole perspective changed. Not to sound trite, but I decided that I wasn't going to let someone else dictate my happiness (personally or professionally).

As a matter of fact, I was completely calm during the 1.5 hours it took me to drive the 15 miles home from work. Friday night was the key...



After work, MKO and I headed over to Col. Heights to scoop the Cuban for a night on the town. We headed to Rosemary's Tyme for a modest birthday celebration. Hanging out with others was cool, but to be honest, being able to walk around in shorts was the freaking bomb! After ducking out of a cook out in VA, we headed home for an early night.

Saturday - This day was amazing from start to finish. It started at about 7:00 a.m. After sucking down a bit of coffee and leafing through the Sunday's Washington Post (delivered on Saturday if you didn't catch that), I shook MKO out of bed. Cruel I know, but it was crazy nice out and I need to get in a long run and this boy needs sun. So with bike in tow, we headed to the National Mall for a nice 8 mile run. It is really days like this that remind me why I love DC. The tourists, the traffic, the monuments, museums, and even the ever-honking cabs...its all amazing.



After leaving the mall, we hooked up with Steph's man again and headed out to the base for an $8 haircut. Its funny, I know. I did this once before and it was a nightmare. But with my new attitude, I could not have cared less what my hair looked like...well, kinda. It actually turned out really good. We quickly departed en route to my very first visit to Costco. It is true, I have never been to a Costco. After grabbing a few items and a $1.50 hot dog, we headed back toward the fort. Oh, and for those that have never been to a Costco, think Wal-mart in the city. Really, this place was nuts. I saw an old woman standing there contemplating a pack of 30 home air fresheners...how fricking back can her house smell for God's sake. Glad I went ONCE.

Yes, it continues. Headed out to Celebrate Tracy's birthday (again) we head home to chill for a bit. But being that its so nice outside, a car was was necessary. For anyone that knows me, I want a new car soooo bad. Trust me, I have tried every angle, but no luck. So after spending









about 3 hours on the car and OMG...its beautiful...what do you think? I'll keep it another year. (did the truck on Sunday)

After washing up we all headed to Adam's Morgan for a night on the town. A good friend of my recently turned 30 ( and I swear we celebrated it last Saturday), but being a good friend, I headed up to Bourbon on 18th street. This place is actually pretty cool. The vibe is good, music good, and it doesn't get crazy crowded. The only drawback is that I am not drinking right now, so people can get a bit annoying.

Sunday - Despite going to bed at 2:00 a.m., I was back up at 7:30 this morning. There is
something to be said for not being hung-over. Forcing MKO out of bed again, we headed out back to give the truck a good scrub. Looks good, doesn't it?

We finished out the day by meeting a good friend from IU at Eastern Market. We walked around a bit then headed to a sweet rooftop restaurant near the Marine Barracks. We finished by strolling through Capitol Hill (I really miss that neighborhood).


Summary - This weekend was so much fun, and not the kind of fun that one usually things about. I was more focused and productive than I have been in months. Maybe its the sun, the greenery sprouting up everywhere, or a maybe I just like myself better.



Things I miss - Beer!

Saturday open...

Woke up early this morning to a crazy beautiful day here in DC. Have a busy day ahead, but wanted to drop a quick note. Still preparing to run the Cincinnati Flying Pig Half Marathon in early May, so headed out in a bit for a long run (wish my knees luck), then to the base for a haircut (wish me luck), and finally to Costco (wish mankind luck). Actually, I've never been to a Costco, but I imagine that it is the Wal-mart for city-folk.

Other than that, mood is very good today.

Recent Obsession:
Chemical Romance, The Black Parade

Oh My God, they killed my AIM guy...those bastards!

For all of you worker bees out there that refuse to do anything at work, but work...turn away. You do not want to know how the other half lives.

This morning I signed on to my laptop, and yes it is a work computer. Anyway, I run through the motions. I open the wireless card, open the Internet explorer to the drudereport (one of my guilty pleasure) and eventually I check the work e-mail account to make sure that I still have a job. At some point during this process AOL AIM starts up. It is not something that I intentionally open, but its there...like an old friend. Well, that old friend did not come around today.

You see, this is my own fault. As a rule, we are not allowed to access any chat services via our laptops. However, somehow, when my new machine was configured they left that door open and I walked through it. Don't get me wrong, I do not spend all day chatting, as a matter of fact, my buddy list is quite sparse. But it is there, it was my little place in the cyber world. I even went so far as to create my own little identity with animations, backgrounds, and even a dog on occasion (yeah, I know what your thinking 14 yr old girl).

So, dumb ass me signed on to the company network yesterday to access some files from our corporate shared drive. That was it, in seconds it was over. The system realized that the program was on my machine and denied me access.

I am going to miss that little guy!

Funny Web Shit 2

I ran into this video a couple of weeks ago and lauged my ass off. It is totally inappropriate in a couple levels, but sometimes you gotta say "hell with it" and laugh at wit.



Tell me what you think...

Has anyone seen my eye?

Well, it looks a whole lot like this...

I had one of those trying days today. You know the ones, its like a premonition...regardless of how hard you fight to change it, you know what the outcome is going to be, and it won't be pretty. This is about my visit to the eye doctor.

Okay, a little background. I have not had my eyes checked since my final semester of grad school, which even then was part of a university study (I'm a cheap ass!). After wearing the same pair of contacts for nearly a year, I decided it best (rather the contacts decided for me) that I get another check up and get some new sporty ones...frankly, I look so old in glasses. So...I made a date.

I went in approximately two weeks ago for the eye exam. If you know DC at all then you know that anything that starts out with "Princes Georges..." can't end good (think any bridge into Virginia = lost). That being said, this experience was normal, with a few exceptions. First of all the technician, who did not speak fluent English, could not quite get the glaucoma test just right. That Ho shot air into my eyes five times. I'm not sure what "HEY" in Spanish means, but it got her attention. So, either the final shot worked or she said "screw it!

Then the Dr. came in and I have to say I always hate this exchange; he wanted to discuss the health of my eyes and all I could think about was how he had to know I was not paying a bit of attention to what he was saying....I was hoping like hell there wasn't a test at the end. I mean, we pay them to be specialists and worry about stuff. I pay you, you worry...that's the deal. Anyway, I relate it to getting stoned with your friends. You become so paranoid that everyone thinks your stoned...including those you smoked with...Anyway, out of nowhere I hear him mention my "condition"...what? I have a condition? I just came in because my last contact lens finally curled too much on the edge and it wouldn't stay in my eye any longer...I don't have a condition! Turns out I do...I have a astigmatism. Finally, after embarrassing this humiliating condition I get the bill...$383.

On, and on a quick side not...I DIDN'T GET CONTACT LENSES

That's right, I had to go back into today for a "quick" check up. I guess to make sure my newly discovered plight did not eat my face or something. Well, this jackass had something else in store for me...he felt he needed to dilate my eyes. I strongly objected (if you've had this done before, you'd understand). They put these drops in your eyes then wait. After a few minutes your eyes completely dilate so that Dr. Charge-Me-For-Something-Else can look at the back of my eye. Basically what happens is your eyes are fooled into believing that there is no light, so the little black center gets huge. So, I succumb. They do their thing, charge me another $90 and put me out in the parking lot...eyes fully dilated....that was a fun drive downtown. Oh, still no contacts!

Mood: Pretty good. I went to the gym twice today...bones are tired, but I feel really good.

Listening to: I have got Glamours absolute stuck in my head. I love that song.

Emotionally Drained...

I can't take it anymore. What the hell is wrong with this world? I had the most bizarre sense of deja vu this morning. I was stopped in the hall at work and someone said with an urgent tone "have you seen the news?" My heart just stopped. I knew it was bad...you can tell because the person telling you won't actually tell you, rather they make you watch with your own eyes. I tuned in and like everyone else, I just stared...who would shoot kids? Better yet, who would exploit such a thing? Oh wait...MSNBC, CNN, Fox, ABC, NBC, CBS.....you get the point.

Is this what it takes to get Al Sharpton's face off the TV every 15 minutes? don't worry true believers, old Al will find a way to conjure up the race issue just as Bush is sure to make the 9/11 connection.

To the media...who are you people? Do you grow up with the hope of being the most inappropriate and insensitive people or is that something your tuition buys you? It baffles me how an "investigative reporter" won't call a politician on being a liar- when its public knowledge that he is - but will ask the police chief (commander) at Virginia Tech "why are you so dispondent about this shooting? Are you not moved?" - ARE YOU FUCKIN KIDDING ME? This asshole is sure to go back to his other reporter friends and brag about his amazing insight and how he fought to get the "real answer" I don't know who that guys was that asked that question, but after seeing the look on the officers face, I wanted to give him a hug.

On a personal note, work is going well. There still seem to be some "transition issues" but hopefully all will be smoothed out soon. As far as the workout, I have gotten more aggressive. I have taken to the Ipod more, which is actually a big issue for me.

Ok, well its late the taxes aren't done and I'm alone...spooky.

Weekend in Review

Well, its 8:41 pm on Sunday, this means that the weekend is officially shot. My work clothes are laid out and my gym bag is packed...I am ready for Monday. Since I really don't have anything to say I thought a quick weekend recap might be appropriate.

Friday Night - As I mentioned last week, Stephanie is heading to S. Africa on Tuesday for a six week adventure. We sent her off good by having a little throw down and Recessions near Farragut North. To say the bar is "ok" is being polite. Its in the basement of a hotel, a hotel to this day I do recall the name. The night was fun. A couple of highlights:

1. I got to meet her crazy friend Erin Marie and this bitch is NUTS. It is so bizarre to meet someone that gets you....no, not in a romantic sense, but in a level of thinking...or in this case, sense of humor. Bottom line: I think we were separated at birth, well except she is black and 29...but you get my point.
2. After leaving Recessions, we went to the bar inside the Jury's Hotel for one more (which I did not need). It was fun, but if I had not enjoyed the previous bar so much, I am sure there is a blog-worthy story...but at this point, it would merely be speculation - don't read into that....I was perfectly happy to sit in a corner and talk about people.
3. Tracy was nice enough to let me crash on her couch...Christ that was a long walk. I did however get the pleasure of listening to her brother throw up his evening.

Saturday - This was definitely a great day to stay in and be hung over. The weather throughout the entire weekend sucked. Michael picked me up and we pretty much hung out around the house. Later on in the evening a small group went out to celebrate Tracy's 30th. I can't believe it...my young friends are in their 30s.

After a pretty good dinner at Rock Bottom Brewery, we walked around Ballston Commons. I've never been so it was a mall. I did buy a new camera. I'm pretty excited about that. Steph her crew and Tracy went to see a play. We skipped out, but I heard it was good.

Sunday - Another rain soaked day. The basement is leaking again, which pretty much sucks. I went for a run today, not the 12 miles I wanted to do, but good enough. It only took a year, but I really enjoy running. I enjoy the challenge of pushing myself and the peacefulness of doing something by myself. I feel really weird going to the gym lately. I don’t feel uncomfortable, rather out of place.

Well, that’s it. I am sure more happened, but odds are, if anyone is even reading my blog anymore, you’ve stopped reading this entry. If, however, you made it this far, thank you for listening.

Saturday...open

Today is a nice day to be in DC. Reading the International Phenom's blog this morning I ran across a funny video (http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/uncensored.shtml) I will never look at Justin Timberlake the same again.

Not a whole lot going on today. I was going to do long run this morning, but since we stayed out way to late celebrating Steph's pending departure to S. Africa, I decided to put it off until tomorrow.

Mood: Pretty good

Friendship....

I discovered yesterday that I have been de-linked from the blogs of two of my friends. Of course I don't blame them, its not like I have kept up with this whole blogging experiment, but to remove someone from your link list...thats like ripping up or throwing away a picture of an ex, you have to keep it...its good karma.

Of course a link on a blog is trivial in the bigger picture. And I know that these two people are not heathens (well one is), but it did put the whole idea of friendship into my head...what does it mean to be a friend. I don't mean that category of people you keep in your cell phone because you will eventually need a drinking buddy or a warm body to act as filler for a party you will eventually throw, but a person(s) that you truly connect with and trust. For me that group is rather small. Don't get me wrong, I have a lot of friends, but very few that I “let in". That list was reduced in the past few weeks and with Steph getting on the plane for S. Africa this Wednesday, will go down again. I’m sure gonna miss her.

So, you see. The de-linking on someone else’s blog is really no big deal, but it is symbolic of what is going on in my life.

I hate feeling depressed.

Homage to great friend...

Since I am in the blogging spirit lately, I spend way more time than I should figuring out what I am going to type. And, if you know me at all, you know that I am completely random and keeping me trained on one thought is a task. Point is, I dreamed the prefect blog...one part political statement, one part social commentary, and two parts funny (at least in my dream).

However, something changed all that this morning. Yesterday, April 10, my sister Michelle celebrated another birthday and due in large part to personal and professional distractions, I completely forgot and was only reminded when I received instant message early this morning. Therefore, this entry is dedicated to her on her blah blah blah birthday.

Being from a close knit family, I have always had a tight relationship with all of my brothers and sisters (7 of us in total). So, being close is not special to us, however, what is interesting is how defined and unique each relationship is. My relationship with Michelle is definitely unique.

At risk of sounding trite, Michelle has supported me all of my life. Since breaking out on my own ten years ago, she has been at every major milestone in my life, regardless of the distance...she made the trip. Each year when my birthday comes around, I will inevitably get a phone call and from the other end of the line I will hear a terribly sung version of Happy Birthday from her and her brood. I always laugh and tell her/them that I love her/them.

Over the past few years Michelle has said to me "man, I'm jealous..." then references a new car, a degree, the house, or a vacation that I went on. And it is true that some fortune has come my way over the past couple years, but it is her that should be envied. And to find out why, simply keep scrolling….






Happy Birthday Sis. You are one of my best friends and I love getting older with you....makes that stupid shit on Warsaw so much funnier.

Identity Crisis....

Work is driving me absolutely crazy....and its all my fault.


Do you ever feel like that stupid ant that is the first out of the rubble of his freshly demolished ant hill to start rebuilding, one piece of sand at a time? That is how I am feeling lately. It seems that no matter how many times I make things right, the next day I am rebuidling the same damn hill.



Other Random Thoughts:

1. Steph is leaving for S. Africa next week. I am sad....
2. I am bidding on new work for our client...nervous, my stomach is turning
3. Supporting my niece by running in Cincinnati's Flying Pig Half Marathon in May...yay, training again
4. Refocusing on home inprovement...it is so easy to avoid when you have a comfy couch and a charged remote control

Thats it for now people....

Spring sprang, then get the hell out of town...

Michael and I, along with Rob and Alley, bought season tickets to the National's this year. It is not looking good for the hometown team, but we're in it for the long haul...or at least until we can get seating priority for the new stadium.

Opening Day was cool. Adarsh (grad school), played hookie that afternoon to sit in the sun and soak up beer. It was a great day. The Nats got beat and we got trashed....either way, expectations were met.

Next game: April 16.

Family, Friends, and Future

2007 is here!!

Yes, it is here and I for one could not be happier. As I mentioned in my previous post, each January 1st I celebrate the passing of an old friend, the cigarette. After 13 years I was finally bid farewell to the habit, or at least shove it to the side. As I was reminiscing about my smoking days, I began feeling a bit nostalgic for changes that have come and gone over the past 12 months. Listed are a few of the highlights:

• In the spring Michael and I said goodbye to our beloved swanky Capitol Hill apartment for a roomy hut on a spot of DC's finest dirt in the NE quadrant. Though it took us a while to get settled, it is now a place we are thrilled to call "home".
• In late summer, Katie G left us for her new life as a medical student. To my joy the crazy life has not jaded our friend. Like old times, we spent New Years Eve doing what we do; looking for crazy shit on the internet.
• Katie F struck out on her own, finding a coolio pad in Georgetown. We don't see much of Katie anymore; funny how a beacon of the liberal left settles so comfortably into the most elite neigoborhood of DC.
• Julian left the great USA to pursue a life in Dutchland, dragging his mother and father along for the purpose of light entertainment.
• Michael procured what has to be one of the coolest jobs in DC; working for the National Gallery of Art.
• After 30 some years or second guessing and putting it off, I got braces!!
• Somewhere along the the line my 9 yr old neice turned 22...whats up with that? Whats the age of consent now, 25?
• Bush, Rove, and Fat Bastard Denny Hastert got their asses handed to him in November. It was an awesome night. Steph did the robot, Chester just showed up, and I'm pretty sure I have a a permanent scar inside my mouth where I got slapped.

I am quite sure there were plenty more items that are missing, but lets be honest, its not like a remember everything/anything when I'm drinking. Heres to 2006, we'll miss you old girl!

Happy New Year

I am not a huge fan of New Year Resolutions, but as I stare 40 right between the eyes (it hasn't flinched yet, but I'll keep you posted), I am becoming more contemplative and open to this silly form of the outward expression of my vunerabilities. I am resolved to becoming a better and more considerate friend. I know what you are thinking; "but John, you are so calm, patient and tolerant with all of us, how could you do more?". And my response...are you that stupid? I'm an ass!

So, here are some things that I am going to fucus on:

1. Answer my phone when it rings


2. Respond more quickly to voice/e-mails


3. Be more tolerant to nice people that do/say stupid things


4. Quit doing/saying stupid things


5. Forgive rather than plot and scheme


6. Listen and restrain the compulsion to comment or advise


7. Drink less, talk less, sleep more


8. Be more inclusive and less snide


9. Compliment rather than Critisize (except for thongs that hang out)

Well, I think thats a good start. Certainly a big task, but hell, I have a year finish it. Oh, and the first person that says; "You know John, remember rule #3, your not being very tolerant..." ITS ON! This is my resolution not your checklist for my entry into heaven....opps, just broke rule #4

Remember this, my 2000 resolution was to quick smoking, and that has been wildly successful...heres to 2007, and 2010...bring it bitch!

Saturday June 10....just a day

This week went by with lil fanfare. Fanny is in some foreign land (Elsalvador) for eleven days, NS has smuggled my baby to an even more foreign land (Nebraska) and Katie is laid up or getting laid, I'm not sure. MKO and I are busy with the new house and preparing for Mom and Gran to come rolling through next week. I think that the cats are becoming suspicious that something is happening. I mean, we do remove furniture, and from their perspective, it is never seen again.

I put the apartment out on the SPEA listserv this week in my first attempt to "give back" to my alumni. It is a sweet apartment and has served us well. I have fond memories of the Fondu party, Wine & Cheese Party, and the "Welcome to D.C." party last fall. Anyway, I'm gonna miss this old place.

You know your old when...

**This is funny as hell. I sat down this afternoon to update my blog. If you can believe it, Fanny had the nerve to scold me for not updating my blog...yep...I did say Fanny (the nerve). Anyway, I opened this draft with the intention to deleting it and laughed. I have no idea where I was going with this thought. It is now clear that I have reached that point in life where it is not just others that and I am not listening too, but myself as well....damn pitty.**

So here is the game. Lets each come up with an ending to this story. You know the players and you know my twisted mind.....lets see what Chrissy does next.

Sweet Taste of Being Right....

Being "Mr. Know-it-all" has finally paid off for me. Not in real U.S. American dollars of course, because that would be gambling, but rather something much closer to one's heart, Bryers Ice Cream. I love this story, not so much because of the ice cream, but because of the irony.

Picture this...

The whole episode started this past Monday morning. MKO and I had decided to travel back in time, I mean... fly back to Indiana this weekend. Having not been back since September I was amazed that NOTHING had changed. I mean it folks, those of you that were in Bloomington with me, believe me when I say it is the same. Fortunately that played to my advantage when I wanted a beer...ole reliable was propped up on a bar stool when I entered the Alley Bar....that was fun, but not the point. Ok, the rest of the weekend want well...blah blah....you don't say, well...blah blah....OMG, fax me later.....!

Monday Morning (Ice Cream D-Day)
My flight leaves at 7:15 which means to the airport by 6:15 which means, leave by 5:15 to make the hour long trek to the IND airport, which means, get up at 4:00 to get ready for work before leaving for the airport = TIRED AS HELL WHEN I GOT OFF WORK!


MKO wasn't due to arrive until the following morning and, because I didn't feel like being responsbile (i.e. lanundry, dishes), I decided beer was a good alternative. So I sent out "the call" and it was not long before myself, Skechko, Fanny, Interenational Pheonom, Schwenny, and Lil KA assembled at a small cafe/buffet for an evening of antics.


Having a blast we are, then it happens. International needs a glass of wine, this is shortly after Schwenny decided that no one should ever drink out of her glass again and breaks it. So she hails down the bartender.

Ok, lets be honest

I am about to round out my fourth week in the private sector and I think its time to come clean. Since leaving the GAO back in January I have had a lot of friends, family, and acquaintances inquire about my new job.

• How is the private sector different from the public?
• Are you working crazy hours?
• What cool projects are you working on?

Thus far my stock answer to all has been that things are going great, which for the most part is true but with one small caveat: I have not done anything yet. The highlight today was finding the cupboard that houses the steno pads. I am not sure why I thought I needed one, but I can now proudly call one my own. That being said, considering the seven months I spent at the GAO, the new place is great.

What GT has that the GAO does not:

• professionalism,
• positive reinforcement,
• strong work ethic, and
• blatant favoritism.

So, until I become inundated with tons of work, keep an eye on my blog and I'll keep an eye on yours.

NS, this ones for you...

Sunday, February 12, 2:30 am

Last night was on of my favorite since moving to D.C. last July. For the most part it was pretty routine. Me, MKO, Skecko, TJ, & Tim met at Union Station had a quick beer at Capitol City Brewing Company, save me (still abstaining), after which the three "dudes" walked to the Hawk and Dove for some fancy tw0-stepping. Like I said, with the exception of the absence of some key players, it was a pretty routine night. What made it so exception was the snow.

I guess I am a kid at heart because I love snow! I hope everyone is enjoying this weekend as much as I did.

Think Spring

What's up Oprah's Ass?

I finally finished it! It was hard ignoring all of the negative media surrounding James Frey's book, A Million Little Pieces, but I did (thank God for short attention spans...right?) and late last night, I concluded my literary adventure. First, let me give mad props to Fanny and Jena for recommending the book to me; I concur, the book is very intense.

Getting back to my original question then; what in the hell is up Oprah's ass? I watched the clips from Larry King Live Show in which the author was interviewed where Oprah made that no infamous call into the show reasserting her support for the reformed addict. I then watched parts of her follow-up interview with Frey in a "live" show designed to provide the viewer comfort in knowing that she was going to trap this evil doer. It was at the point that I had a vision.....**queue the dre am sequence music***I look at Frey sitting there, probably stoned out of his mind and wracked with grief because Lilly is gone, and I am instantly reminded of the biblical story of the immaculate conception. Picture it, Mary standing in the center of a huge ditch showing her 9 months of pregnancy awaiting her inevitable doom all while telling onlookers that this child...ahhh...the one, you know, God's son!....yea yea that’s it, God's son will save all of us from the wrath of God....yeah, God did it. I could hear Oprah's audience chanting "stone him, stone the motherf****r him" followed by, "seriously Oprah, where’s our new car?" As Oprah ascends from her stage on Chicago's near west side back up to her throne in heaven she utters the now glorious diatribe against the reviled author; "It is difficult for me to talk to you because I really feel duped...but more importantly I feel that you betrayed millions of readers. "

Who the hell is she kidding that is what I really want to know. I read the book and I could tell from the first few paragraphs that at best, the story was exaggerated? I mean, please! He is passed out on a plane with a bleeding from a 1" hole in his cheek, teeth completely knocked out, and boxers full of piss and shit...yeah....tell me Oprah, what airline was that anyway? Don't get me wrong, I have always admired her, but I do not believe for a minute that she took this book at 100% face value. If she did, she is very naive. Furthermore, if the queen of talk really felt that the book was so misleading and such a betrayal to her readers, then why did she not demand that the Oprah's Book Club seal be removed. Well, we know why....but it’s a point she neglected to address during her sermon. (hint: $$)

Come and knock on our door....

And then there were 3.....


It has been a week and she still comes back to the apartment after work!! Translation: I have not yet driven here to intense psycho-therapy or hard drugs. **snaps for JS** And for you ladies and gentlemen that need an hour and a half to get ready in the morning (me), take note; this international phenom is up, showers, dresses, and is out the door in 15 minutes. However, I have never gotten close enough at this hour to see if eyes were fully operational....welcome, heres to a great stint in casa JS/MKO.

Side Notes:

• Thanks Fanny for hostessing the Super Bowl party. It was a lot of fun, even if the end result wasn't what I had hoped for. Refs suck!
• Love the new job; however, I have yet to be put on an assignment which makes the days drag a little. On the up side, I have really befriended the Crate and Barrel outlet store next door.
• MKO is waiting to hear back on a groovy job here in the district. I am really hoping that it comes through.
• That groundhog needs to go! Is it me or did this crappy weather start up after that overgrown bloated rat ran back into its hole. I hate him.
• Running...dieting...abstaining from beer...mood varies.

Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty.....

Ok, well maybe it is not been that bad, but for anyone who has worked for the federal government, there is uneasiness about abandoning the safety and security of the bureaucratic black hole. Two weeks ago today, I did just that and to my surprise, I survived. However, the week leading up to my departure was at minimum, bizarre.

First let me start with a little advice to those considering a career change; never, and I mean NEVER give a month notice. I made such a mistake back in December. It was the right thing to do...right? WRONG.

Picture this;

The Notice: In a role worthy of a best actor nod (watch out Jake...grr), I went to my supervisor and with great sorrow in my voice and compassion in my eyes, I informed her that I had decided to depart the (stealing a line from Pie Pants) blah blibdy blah blah agency. Her response: "Thank God, you could not be leaving at a better time. This is not the place for someone with your drive and talent". Oh no she didn't, this bitch totally steals my thunder and whats more, obviously aspiring to take the gold statuette for best dramatic performance by a bitter bitch playing the role of a supportive senior government cog, is truly genuine. She actually gets up and hugs me. Things could not have gone better. I walk out skipping.

Three/Two Weeks To Go: Its the week between Christmas and New Years and everyone, well at least 70% of the agency is gone. I spend the week working my ass off trying to make a dent in the files on my desk. I meet with boss lady, who by the way is still so supportive I want to puke, and go over a laundry list of items to take care of before I leave. I could not believe how extensive, but I the one that volunteered to give the four week notice. I ask for and receive the priority for each item. I then hit the list with a vengeance. All is good....I feel good and I get an excellent X-mas gift from MKO.

Two Weeks to Go: I'm now at that point where just about everyone knows that I am leaving. All is going smooth. Isn't it terrible that the only time people make you feel welcome is when you’re leaving? It is late in the week and something weird starts to happen. I keep getting pulled aside by colleagues wanting to know where I am going and what I am going to be doing all while slipping me their business card. T

The next day in the middle of a team meeting all hell breaks loose. My supervisor wants to know how my final tasks are progressing and I give what I think is a positive report....really I didn't have much left to do.

Boss: When will task X be complete? (Mind you this is the lowest priority item)

Me: It will be done by next Friday.

Boss: IT NEEDS TO BE DONE BEFORE YOU LEAVE!

Me (internal voice): What the f***?

Me: I don't see a problem with it being done before next Friday. The only problem I can see is if something goes wrong with priority #1 Project.

Boss: (rolls eyes), just make sure it’s done.

Pissed, I go back to my desk and finish this crucial project before I left for the day.

Forward Final Day: What in the hell is going on???? It is Friday, January 20...D day. I have completed the work I was assigned, trained staff on ongoing projects, and cleaned out my desk. So I sit and wait, I know that boss lady will be around soon to give me an awkward goodbye....I sit and I wait. Its 3:15, I know it is coming soon....I start to twitch a little...how long will this take. She leaves at 3:45 so I know it will have to be soon...I sit and I wait. That bitter bitch trumped me again, now seeking the statuette for best bitch within the federal government, giving Condi a run for her money!!

Moral of the Story: Never give a four week notice. The reason for this is simple your boss, whether it be male/female/government manager, is dying to wear a couture Coco Chanel dress and $100,000,000 worth of diamonds on the red carpet in March.

Just when you thought Tom was safe....

Like most of you I spent this past weekend thinking of how we can get Tom out of this mess. Towards the end of the week things for "The Hammer" were starting to look up. His request for a new judge seems highly likely considering the current one, Judge Bob Perkins, was a recent contributor to MoveOn.org. Which as you know, anyone who contributes to Move On cannot be trusted with presiding over any legal preceding. However, over the weekend I came across some value information that leads me to believe that Judge Perkins may be the lesser of Mr. Delay's worries....see below

As you can see from these photos, in his effort to discredit Judge Perkins and Tumble Weed Junction Prosecutor Ronnie Earle, Tom is showing demonstrating his honestly by confessing to the world that "he has sinned against us", he has flaws...he has the dreaded...uneven nostrils.

There is no way out now